Marriage as a Commitment?

For the past year, i've attended quite a number of wedding dinner, mostly from my friends or colleagues or SQ's friends. And every dinner i went to i'll hear people asking "When's your turn?".

Honestly, i'm not sure when is my turn. I've got a plan but it's still at such a draft phase that i really don't know when is the exact date this would happen. So when someone ask me when is my turn to tie the knot, i'll just answer soon.

It's very subjective, the word "Soon". Soon can be a year or two, or even a month or two depending on the urgency of the wedding ceremony. Some can be very urgent so that the stomach don't show too much before the wedding but hope that kind of fortunate situation will not happen to me.

But then i starts to wonder, what is the meaning of mearriage. Is it just something that couple do when they have been together for some time? Or is it something that couple do when they are growing older? Or is it something that couple do because their parents are pestering them to?

Don't get me wrong, i love SQ. In fact i can picture myself living the rest of my life with her, waking up next to her every morning, kissing her forehead before she dozed off at night, growing old with her. She's the most beautiful thing that had ever happened to me in this lifetime.

i don't mind marrying her of course but i really want to understand what is the meaning of marriage! How do i know if i'm ready to make this decision?

i'm not worried about the commitment, i'm not the lack-of-responsibility type. But how do i know if i'm a good husband? How do i know if i'm not? Is there "Husband for Dummies" selling in MPH? Is there any guides or reading material to refer to?

What about financial & career stability? i don't think i'm financially stable now, not to mention career wise. The expenditure will definitely be different once two people are married to each other, which normally is higher although both are working. Is that right? i really don't know.....

Anyway, i may be just thinking too much. i always thought i'm the happy-go-lucky type, but apparently not. i'm now officially the worry-too-much-about-everything type.




ChiM

For The First Time....

i think 2009 started off in a pretty interesting way. For starters, there are a lot of '1st times' happening to me or around me but i'm a part of it or a witness to it.

For starters, interesting stuffs has been happening to my home state of Perak.

For the first time Perak is taken over completely by the opposition party and some improvements can finllay be seen made to the long forgotten town of Ipoh.

For the first time, party-hopping has been such a hit that assemblymen jump out & back into a certain party.

For the first time, Perak was on the front page of all the daily national newspapers for our jumping political issue.

For the first time i hear someone threatened to sue the DYMM Paduka Sultan of Perak, Sultan Azlan Shah.

For the first time, we have 2 Menteri Besar in Perak.

For the first time, i read riots happening outside the Istana Iskandariah Kuala Kangsar to the point where tear bombs needs to be fired.

For the first time, massive traffic jam that goes several kilometre of bumper-to-bumper crawl which lasted several hours due to road blocking at the exit to Jusco in Ipoh Garden East.


Apart from that, more closer to heart is work.

For the first time i've witness the economic recession hit so hard that so many people lost their jobs and i'm beginning to feel fear i might be next.

For the first time i'm experiencing the VSS program.

For the first time, i'm willing to have my salary deducted for the better good of the company.

For the first time, losing my job is not an option.


Also, there are other things that are even more closer to heart but it's too personal to disclose to the pool of limitless information. i guess that's what it means to grow up & survive in this society.





ChiM

The Ox-spicious 2009

Well, it's almost over the celebration of the 2009 Ox-spicious year. Well, this lunar year started off in a very different way then all those years i've been celebrating so many years before.

They bad part is, the economy is still a slum. My company is already embarking on the voluntary separation scheme thingy. I'll get my pay-cut starting next month if i'm still keeping my job then. Still busy like hell at work. Having not enough rest for the past week. Shoes & slippers died off on me. Neck & shoulder pain. Didn't see May Lynn over CNY this year.

Well, the good part of it is that i started off with getting lots of angpow and blessings from a number of people i care about and they care about me. Then i had some really great gatherings with friends, colleagues, ex-colleagues, family, relatives & more friends.

Amanda drop by Ipoh with her Sis Alicia over the weekend. I had a great time meeting up with old friends from uni time. Too bad there wasn't enough time to show her around town more. I think i'm quite bad as a tour guide, couldn't get her to try out our most famous white coffee. I sure do hope she enjoyed herself over this short trip. i know i enjoyed it alot.

i asked my good friend in my company today if she thought i was different from the person i was almost 3 years back when she first know me. She say i didn't change too much, just happier.

i know who i got to thank for being this way. Definitely not my boss or my job. You know i'm talking about you right?

Thank you for making me so happy.




ChiM