Marriage as a Commitment?

For the past year, i've attended quite a number of wedding dinner, mostly from my friends or colleagues or SQ's friends. And every dinner i went to i'll hear people asking "When's your turn?".

Honestly, i'm not sure when is my turn. I've got a plan but it's still at such a draft phase that i really don't know when is the exact date this would happen. So when someone ask me when is my turn to tie the knot, i'll just answer soon.

It's very subjective, the word "Soon". Soon can be a year or two, or even a month or two depending on the urgency of the wedding ceremony. Some can be very urgent so that the stomach don't show too much before the wedding but hope that kind of fortunate situation will not happen to me.

But then i starts to wonder, what is the meaning of mearriage. Is it just something that couple do when they have been together for some time? Or is it something that couple do when they are growing older? Or is it something that couple do because their parents are pestering them to?

Don't get me wrong, i love SQ. In fact i can picture myself living the rest of my life with her, waking up next to her every morning, kissing her forehead before she dozed off at night, growing old with her. She's the most beautiful thing that had ever happened to me in this lifetime.

i don't mind marrying her of course but i really want to understand what is the meaning of marriage! How do i know if i'm ready to make this decision?

i'm not worried about the commitment, i'm not the lack-of-responsibility type. But how do i know if i'm a good husband? How do i know if i'm not? Is there "Husband for Dummies" selling in MPH? Is there any guides or reading material to refer to?

What about financial & career stability? i don't think i'm financially stable now, not to mention career wise. The expenditure will definitely be different once two people are married to each other, which normally is higher although both are working. Is that right? i really don't know.....

Anyway, i may be just thinking too much. i always thought i'm the happy-go-lucky type, but apparently not. i'm now officially the worry-too-much-about-everything type.




ChiM