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What's did those sayings says again? Sadness divided, happiness multiplied when you share them with your friends?

But you see, being a friend doesn't get over-time pay. Being a friend still needs to sleep like everyone else before tomorrow starts again.

And i love them enough not to wake them up at this ungodly hours during the weekdays.

i'm feeling emo again. All of a sudden, i seriously don't know why.

Those self-doubting questions keep popping up in my mind. It's more like some flashing images of the fraction of my imagination on things i could have done better but didn't or could never be possible for me to do but how much i wished i could have done it.

i always remember this phrase my dad told me, "Take care of the future, and the future will take care of itself". Well, i'm trying to take good care of the future, but what if my taking care of the future is not sufficient for the future to take care of itself?

But, i wouldn't know right? Maybe i am doing good enough. Maybe i'm doing better than good. Maybe i'm doing marvelous. But i wouldn't know, would it? Well, at least not until the future is here, and then i look at the report card & thought to myself, "Damn, i should've studied that chapter."

Or like, what if i was there when he was being a jerk? Maybe i could stop all those pain she went through? Maybe if she had other choices then she wouldn't be hurt so much. Maybe if i was there then i could be a choice. Maybe. Maybe, but i couldn't be, could i?

So, now i'm telling myself, once i'm done with this post, i'm going to turn off my laptop, switch off the lights, strip down to my undies, and go to bed, sleep tight, and fight again tomorow.

She always tell me when i'm being emo, "You can't be hyper all the time right?". She makes me feel that sometimes i take too much responsibility onto my shoulders, and i should sometimes let go of them a little while before moving them up again. She's always been so supportive of me.

And so now, i'm putting down my shoulders to rest. They're not broad, so they can't take too much load for too long. They need rest. i need rest.

good nite.





ChiM